Where did the time go?

I can't believe it's already June!  This year has FLOWN by!  I didn't blog much in May because I could barely sit still!  I was up in Dallas for family graduations, my sister's dance recital and a wedding. 

My friend Ally, Bride, Groom and Me!

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         When I was finally back in San Antonio I was focused on work.  June 4th and 5th I worked the 7 am breakfast until the 7 pm reception. To recover from my 24 hour working weekend I took a trip to Corpus Christi and went fishing in Port Aransas on the 10th and 11th. I didn't think I was a fan of fishing. Why sit around all day for the possibility of catching something (you don't know what, but something). As you can tell, I only participate when I know the end result is a sure thing. This is why I'm hesitant to gamble or play the stock market. This may also be why I am single and not on the career path I prepared for in college.

          The fishing trip was nice if you disregard the sea-sickness and the friendship that tragically ended. The 2 story fishing boat was air-borne at least 3 times and the rocky waters went on for an hour and a half! I didn't eat breakfast, so the only thing that came up was the champagne from the night before. Yea- eww!!
          And as for the friendship: I’ve come to realize as flattering as it is for someone to want to spend all their time with you, it can be draining and unhealthy. My mental, physical and emotional health were being sacrificed for the satisfaction of having someone who will "always be there".
         Always be there for what?
         Always be there for who?
The only person who needs to "always be there" for me is me. I don't say that in a selfish way, I say that because I'm not always there for me. I depend and let other people be there for me so that I don't hold all the responsibility. The person on this trip was always there for me but they would take a part of me with them, leaving me empty, drained, and lacking in self satisfaction and even self love (why love yourself when someone else can?)
          After the trip and after I guess "finding myself" in the Gulf of Mexico, I came back to San Antonio and finally felt at peace in my house. I had never really considered it "home" but after being on an island of awkwardness for three days, by Sunday I was able to relax in the comfort of the home I've created for myself. Which if I might add is FABULOUS!
         As I'm re-connecting with friends in town I'm choosing to only let in positive and healthy people. To only share my time (note: not give my time, but share it) with people who will make me a better person and friend. People who love me and I freely love in return.

Because really, at the end of the day, all you need is love.

-Rachel